Wednesday, April 19, 2006

the broken road

Everytime I look back at all the crappy things that have happened along the way to where I am, I realize that I would not be where I am today without them. Even with my God, as a matter of faith, when I am struggling with feeling like I am going nowhere and have gotten myself somewhere I probably was not meant to be, I take a deep breath and by faith, remind myself that I am brought along the way by Him, that he knows where I am and is with me. I bless the bad and the good and welcome what I know he will bring into my life, because all things work for good for those who love God, for those whoa re called according to his purpose. Who am I to say that the bad stuff wasn't just a way of shaping me that I never could or would have imagined for myself? Who am I to say that the bad stuff shouldn't have happened? Yeah, it sucked, but I amstill here and still sucking air. I bear no ill will toward those who made me who I am.
Bless The Broken Road - Rascal Flatts
Verse 1
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

Verse 2
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

how do you define old?

My 11 year old son, you know, the one with the cherubic face in the last posting, is now about an inch taller than me. I mentioned that he is only 11? An inch, not shorter, taller. When did this happen? I have been keeping an eye on the marks on the kitchen doorway and they have been safely below the critical threshold. He went to bed one day and woke up three inches taller. Last Dr visit, which was not that long ago, I think, anyway, it was within the past year, he was 2 inches shorter. How does a kid grow three inches without warning? How much bigger does he get? Where am I goign to find clothes to fit this anomaly? I have an even cuter picture of him somewhere, while still a baby baby, like three moths old. We had one of those inhome professional photographers come in, and he is in a little red and white striped baseball uniform complete with hat. It is the most precious thing you have ever seen. Sigh.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Art around our home

My eldest when she was about a year old. She is now almost 18, and boy do I feel old!

Another one by mom in law, nice landscape, it hangs in the living room.

My daughter's room, her counselor said it would be good to have something listing attributes she would like to have or that she has, kind of an affirmation thing. Of course I couldn't just list them, I had to add some glitter.

Iona abbey. A gift from my friend and our priest when he went there, I had given him a book with devotions based on prayers from Iona, and he gave me this picture. It is beautiful.

My eldest, who lives with her dad, drew this for my daughter. Almost 18, my oldest daughter is a wonderful artist. She will be getting a degree in graphic arts.

My dad painted this, way back when. He passed away in 86, so this is very special to me. He carved wood, did carpentry, and painted. He wasn't trained but had a natural talent.

My mom and dad, a few years back.

My two youngest, they were absolutely adorable, about 1 and 2 years old. Aren't they cute?

Another art work by my 13 year old, when she was 7. I know this because it has her name and "Age 7" on it.

My mother in law painted this. She has a fine arts degree and does or did a lot of work earlier. This is set by the ocean, probably in SC or thereabouts.

I made this after 9/11 along with several others as table decorations for a church meal. They are simply glass beads mortared onto a votive holder. They shine like stained glass.

My daughter's latest art, it's acrylic! SHe wasn't sure what it was, just a mix of colors. Looks like the ocean to me.

My daughter drew this in Kindergarten, I have saved it all these years and hang it wherever we live. It is dog eared but well loved.

One of my senior pictures, it hangs in my bedroom. My dad got it framed several years ago with an antique frame he found. I like the frame as much as the picture.

Detail from the frame, isn't it exquisite?

A lovely gift from Sharon, hangs in my kitchen. I love angels!

A gift from the priest who did our marriage renewal, it is an icon for the "Wedding at Cana", where Jesus performed his first miracle of changing water into wine.

A good reminder

In my prayer time yesterday, God reminded me of something I need to remember better. He loves me, anyway. Not until, not if, not when, not because, not anything. He loves me, anyway. I know that I do stupid things, that I mess up, that I miss the mark, all the time, but the thing is, he doesn't sit around waiting for me to finally hit the mark and then he bewtows upon me the love I want and need. He just loves me, anyway. I am loved, and accepted and valued. We spend a lot of our lives trying feel valued (and doing things that we think give us value, a works mentality) or feeling unvalued, and not caring what we do because it matters not at all. God never views us as without value. He paid a huge price, the ultimate price to redeem us, placing a higher value on us than his own life. He valued us so much he was willing to die in order to save us. He did that for me before I was even born, knowing I would mess us time and again. He didn't do it because I earned it, he did it because he loves me. And he loves me not because of what I do. He loves me, anyway.