Monday, October 31, 2005

A blog about nothing really

I am sorry I have not had anything to say for a while, I have been so ass kicking busy lately, I can't even describe with what, just the daily grind. There ahve been so many little things to do it seems like I don't get down time, even on the weekends. Maybe it's working every day, I have worked part time for so many years, I have not worked 5 days a week in a long time, even though my job is half time, it is every day, so there just isn't a break. I get home and barely get lunch before child number 1 comes home, then an hour later it's child number two, hoprefully I have no errands to run but if I do, it's dinner time when I get back. Hubby and I have had a class for kids with ODD (oppositional defiant disorder), which is across town, at 6:30 in the evening, for 1 1/2 hours every tuesday. Weds is church night, which leaves Thurs and Fri for appointments, errands, etc. I am supposed to spend a half hour a few days a week with problem child 1 to give her positive, undemanding time just to enjoy being together etc. You'd think this would just be natural but with a kids iwth ODD, nothing goes like it should. They get into this vicious circle of acheiving attention by negative means, getting conditions to expect that when they misbehave parents will pay attention, and when they don't, parents (who are exhasted and glad for the break) don't pay attention (that's because parents are asleep or locked in the bathroom pulling their hair out). You have to teach them that they can get positive attention also. Oy!

I have really enjoyed church recently, worship time has been wonderful. I have felt, for the first time since I had trouble with the anxiety (which by the way is so much better now, I can't even describe how nice it is to not be anxious) I felt joy. I felt like worshipping, not just going through the motions. I wanted to feel like worshipping but it was as if that part of my spirit was just shut down, and then all of a sudden, there it was again. It's like being blind for a while, and then seeing again, when you weren't sure you would. I know that God has me in his hands, and I have faith that I was healthy and whole, but it is so good to feel healthy and whole. LIke a drink of cold water when you are really thirsty.

I have been looking for a bible reading plan, it sure helps to give me focus, and stay on track. I want to read the bible, but it can be hard to just pick it up and read, I always end up in psalms. So a guide is good. I don't want it to be a legal thing, like I have to, but I want to, I just wnat it to be productive. I try not to beat myself up if I miss a few days, but I try to get back to it. I sense that it helps me more than I know, I just feel better and it gives me a platform for prayer. It also is just good for the discipline part. I can be undisciplined, and I need to learn that I don;t always have to be entertained.

God is good and his mercy endures forever!

Sunday, October 09, 2005


We went to Hood River today to pick up apples. I have a great orchard I go to each year, called Mt View orchards, in Parkdale, which is a little town up in the hills above Hood River, on the way to Mt Hood. They ahve a lot of apples, but my favorite are the mystery apples. They have varieties that were given to the family several years ago on which info about them has been lost to time. They range from sweet to tart, big, little, hard, soft etc. It's just a big jumble of anything goes, for 25cents/pound. They make great apple sauce because there is such a variety of flavors. We got about 100 lbs, so I will be appl-ing for quite a while yet. I look at the boxes, big, big boxes full of apples on my dining room table. It makes me tired. I think I will have to dry some because honestly, I don't thing we'll eat that much apple sauce. But it's so good. We got pears too. Sigh.
Good fall to y'all!

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

the blame game

A commentary on the current climate of blame.

Monday, October 03, 2005

I noticed this morning on the MSH volcano cam site the picture was particularly beautiful, it has been cloudy for several days so all you can see is grey on the cam, then today it cleared enough to see a new dusting of snow and steam rising from the emerging dome. Wow.